jozjozjoz.com :: brain barf... yum!

Is this proof that my car is evil? (Part I)

(Warning: Long post ahead!)

I should've known better than to get into my car when that's what it said to me this morning.

This entire saga actually began last week when I realized that my car registration is up for renewal & the deadline is 11/16 and that I needed to get a smog check before I could get my tags. What was to be a routine trip to the car place for an oil change and a smog check has turned into an ordeal that is going to cost me many hundreds of dollars that I wasn't prepared to spend.

I found out after spending three hours sitting in the cold car repair shop waiting for my smog check that my car was going to fail the smog check because the check engine light was on. Well, my check engine light has been on for several months and I didn't worry about it because my dad had taken my car to the shop for repairs and they "fixed" a broken sensor and then *insisted* that there was nothing wrong with my car and not to worry if the Check Engine light came on again. As long as I took my car in for regular oil changes/maintenance check-ups, my car should be fine.

(more after the jump)

Well, it turns out that the reason my Check Engine light keeps going on is because that I had TWO broken sensors and that I couldn't pass the smog check without them being replaced. That was $450 for the parts, not including labor! Since I had no choice but to have it fixed so I could get my registration taken care of, I had them drop me off for a few hours at work so they could get the parts from the dealer and handle it by the end of the day.

When I picked it up, they said that I needed to drive the car about 50 miles or so to "reset" the system & to bring the car back again on Monday to try the smog check again. But on Saturday, the Check Engine light went back on again after about 10 miles of driving, so I called the shop & they said they'd get it taken care of today.

So I really didn't have a choice but to go back to the car repair place today and I even brought a book this time to keep me occupied while waiting. Aside from the Check Engine light being on again, the first thing I noticed was that my odometer said "66666." That should've been my first clue to turn around and go back home. If I had, then maybe I would've noticed that I had left my cell phone in my office, which I almost never leave my house without.

But I pressed on through the pouring rain, hazardous drivers, and potholes hidden in huge puddles to make it to the car repair shop. After handing my keys to the guys, I plopped myself down with my book in the waiting room.

It was at this time that one of the other customers (an older gentleman wearing raingear & holding an umbrella) decided that even though my face was in my book, that I wanted to have a conversation with him. (I told you I was a weirdo magnet.) He complained about the slippery floor, warned me not to go to the bathroom because I'd have to walk across the wet tile (like I'd go to the bathroom at a car repair shop anyway), complained about the rain, and then complained about the bad L.A. drivers in the rain. When he was done, I said, "Yeah" and went back to my book. Two paragraphs later, he began complaining about his car and telling me how it was spewed stream and how he had to bring it in and how his car was 11 years old and how he wasn't sure that he wanted to fix it if it was very expensive, since he didn't know how much longer he was going to be alive, that it might not be worth it to spend the money fixing his car. Um... what exactly is the appropriate response to that? I didn't know & since reading didn't stop him from talking, I decided I'd just change the subject back to the rain, so maybe he would stop talking about how he was going to die soon.

Luckily for me, the repair dude came over with my keys soon after that. I'd only been there 15 minutes and they told me that they hadn't hooked up some hose to the sensor properly last week & that's why my Check Engine light went back on, but I had to drive my car another 50 miles before I could do my smog check. I don't know how I'm supposed to have time to bring this damn car back again, but I say "ok" and "thank you" and run through the rain to jump into my car. Even though I have my umbrella, I am covered in huge drops of rain & when I get into the car, it sounds like it's raining marbles. I turn on my engine and back up slowly... right into a white Civic that was just dropped off in the middle of the driveway by a tow truck. I couldn't even see it! Between the rain all over all my mirrors and windows and the location of the Civic, there couldn't have been a bigger blind spot. And I did it right in front of all the car repair guys, who already thought I was a dope.

So pulled up again and grabbed my umbrella so I could examine the damage and I detonated my automatic umbrella, which unfurled itself inside my car. Meanwhile as my right arm was wrestling to get the umbrella out of the car, my entire left side has already left the car, which was getting drenched in the downpour. By this time, the car repair dude has come out to survey the damage, which looked worse than it actually was. My car was completely fine.

As I'm giving the car repair dude my drivers license and insurance information, the other guys pushed the Civic out of the driveway and wiped off the part I hit (which had been covered in dirt and the rubber from my bumper). Here is a picture of the dents I made; I circled them because they are so hard to see. Nevertheless, I left my info & told the car repair guy that I'd even pay for fixing it at the body shop next door, if the car owner agreed to it.

I was ready to get back in my car & brave the roads again, when I walked up to my car and realized that my car doors were locked! The headlights were still on and so I must've jumped out of the car & the doors must've locked themselves with the keys in the ignition!

If you think that it couldn't have gotten any worse, it does. Stay tuned for Part II and if you feel sorry for me for having such a terrible morning, please cheer me up by voting for jozjozjoz for Best Overall Blog in the 2004 Best of Blog Awards.