jozjozjoz.com :: brain barf... yum!

Is this gossip?

I was out at a restaurant today for a sit-down lunch.

A hygenically-challenged homeless lady, who was carting around her entire home in a shopping cart and a rolling suitcase entered the restaurant and sat herself down in the corner. She drew stares as she rolled her house between the rows of tables filled with seated customers. After she made herself comfortable in the corner and left everyone else alone, people went back to their meals in peace and ignored her.

I made the mistake of going to the restroom and as I was returning to my seat, I saw that this lady had gotten up from her seat and was hassling one of the bus staff, who was busy clearing off a table across from where I was seated.

Without saying a word, the lady stood at the table in waved her arms in the air at all the passing staff members, making faces. The poor girl who was just trying to clean up some dishes didn't know what the lady wanted, and kept saying, "What? What do you need? I'm sorry. I don't understand..."

A waiter came up to see if he could help, but before he could say a word, the homeless lady grabbed a dirty glass which the previous guests at that table had already used and spit (threw up) all kinds of liquid of a yellow-greenish hue, including some chunky brown bits into the dirty glass. Then she turned around and took the glass back to her table with her.

At that point, I hadn't eaten very much & it's a good thing, because I thought I was going to hurl then & there.

I tried very hard to put some food in my tummy, but it was a lost cause. I left lunch without actually eating lunch & until I sat down to write this, I was hungry.

But replaying that scene in my head made me lose my appetite again.

Roadkill Diet™, be damned.

The Homeless-lady-spewing pee/poo-like-substance-from-her-mouth-into-a-glass-one-table-away Diet™ is the way to go.