Freakin exhausted… but not sleepy

I hate it when I stay up so late, I can’t get myself to sleep.

After getting up at 9am to be on the Westside by 10am, I have not stopped running all day.

Even after my seminar ended at 10pm, I came home to clean up my inbox (Eudora jacked up my incoming messages and basically downloaded the same emails over and over again) and then work on some paperwork for something non-school related I’m handling tomorrow night.

That’s right. After a full day of school junk, I’ve got more work to do at night.

Tomorrow (ok, later today really) I’m supposed to get to the Westside at (eek!) 7:30am for an (double eek!) 8:30am session, continuing on our Ethics discusssions. That won’t end until 5pm and then I’ve got to drive to the other side of town by 7pm. And I have to visit my Grandma who has been in the hospital for a week now. (Sorry I didn’t blog about it sooner… I couldn’t bring myself to do it.)

There is another auction happening on Sunday so that means most of my day will be spent working, as well.

Not only do I not have enough time to do my personal work/bills/chores (I never seem to have time), I won’t have time to study/read for school for my Finance class. I won’t even talk about resting/relaxation… that’s a pipe dream for me at this point.

I sometimes find it irritating when people tell me I should “prioritize better” and “take time for myself.” The fact is, I do this to myself because I do all this work (in one form or another) to take care of my family… this is my priority. Even before my Dad passed away, I was always working hard to save for the “rainy day” which I knew would come. Now that it has happened, I realize that I have to work even harder and help pitch in to handle a lot of the things my Dad used to take care of. And I know I may not take care of myself very well, but my gift to myself (for the time being) is investing in my future by getting an MBA.

I know need to figure out how to stick “my health” to the top of that priority list because I know that without my health, I won’t be any good to my family. But we’re all still dealing with so much stuff related to my Dad’s passing, I need to be strong for my family, and especially make sure that we take good care of my Mom and Grandma. I’m just trying to keep all the balls in the air and trying not to get sick.

Anyway, it’s almost 2am now and I’m really going to try to get some shut eye. Maybe one of these days I’ll have something interesting to say so you don’t have to come here are read about my workaholic days.

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