A couple of weeks ago, I was sharing some stories from when I lived in Washington DC with two female friends who are about my age. One of the things I mentioned was the time that I had dinner with Betty Friedan.
“Who’s that?” they both asked.
I was shocked. How do two independent college educated women not know who Betty Friedan is?
“She wrote The Feminine Mystique,” I answered.
I was greeted with blank stares.
“You know,” I continued, “one of the most important books that spurred the modern feminist movement?” (Ok, I know I was over-simplifying the impact of the book, but I was just hoping I would spark something.)
The two stared at me some more and were totally unimpressed.
While I wasn’t trying to impress them, even I am shocked and surprised at my good fortune of having had the opportunity to meet Ms. Friedan at an intimate dinner party with just a dozen incredible women. When I look back at this experience, I consider myself incredibly honored to have been included in this event. Truly a once in a lifetime experience.
The last time I read The Feminine Mystique was well over a decade ago, but the impact of the writing never left me. Not only did it help me understand the struggles of the feminist movement (from which I have benefitted greatly from), it also moved me to see that it was possible for one person to make a huge difference with her ideas and writing. This ground-breaking 1963 book sparked a revolution, challenging women to want more out of life than what was already planned for them as little girls: marriage, babies, cooking, and cleaning. Very powerful stuff, to say the least.
I wish I had kept a journal of my time in DC because I had so many incredible experiences which I only partially remember today. While there were many other amazing women at this dinner party, I remember an evening of scintillating dinner conversation, followed by dessert in the living room with Betty sitting in an orange armchair with everyone seated around her. She was totally the star of the night and none of us could express how much her work had meant to us.
“I’m not done,” she said that night. “I’m working on changing people’s minds about aging.”
She had just finished writing her book Life So Far and talked about how rich her life has become with age and she challenged our notions of the benefits of youth.
The details of that evening have become hazy over time, but I am grateful that the shining memory of that night was sitting next to her during dessert while this incredible group of women exchanged ideas. Here’s a snapshot from that night of Betty Friedan and myself… it’s not the best quality (back in the days before digital cameras), but it is truly priceless to me:

I am so saddened to hear about Betty Friedan’s passing today on her 85th birthday. The world has truly lost a legend and I am forever honored to have ever spent any time at all in her presence.
“The problem that has no name — which is simply the fact that American women are kept from growing to their full human capacities — is taking a far greater toll on the physical and mental health of our country than any known disease.”
- Betty Friedan, The Feminine Mystique, 1963. NY: Dell Publ., 1974.
::NOW: National Organization for Women (Betty Friedan was a co-founder of NOW):: ::send NOW your own tribute to Betty:: ::pbs interview of Betty Friedan:: ::npr::
::radgeek:: ::the new homemaker:: ::sharilynhorne:: ::feministing:: ::baldanders:: ::jane genova:: ::msmarvel:: ::fauxreal:: ::robin herman:: ::last plane to jakarta:: ::libertybelles’ clara:: ::pinko feminist hellcat:: ::the democratic daily:: ::msmagazine’s executive editor, katherine spillar:: ::thedword:: ::the leslie show/a>::
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